EP.45
‘Jin’s room? Hmm, I didn’t think there was anything special about it. Just a typical guy’s room, I suppose? That’s about the extent of my impression.’
‘Hmm, but isn’t it interesting? Kaya, you have quite the curiosity about another man’s room. Isn’t it unusual for a young lady to be interested in that?’
‘Me? Oh, I’m an exception. After all, Jin and I aren’t just strangers. We’re friends, and before that, we had a teacher-student relationship, and even before that, a boy-girl relationship…’
‘…Now that I think about it, it’s a bit embarrassing. Anyway, I have more than enough reasons to enter his room. Jin is my friend, mentor, and someone I’m very close to.’
‘But Kaya…’
‘You have no relationship with him at all.’
‘Don’t you think it’s a bit strange to enter the room of someone with whom you’re not close and have no relationship?’
“…..”
She walked, aimlessly and thoughtlessly, just walking.
When she finally came to her senses, she found herself standing not in Altina’s hospital room, but in the middle of an unfamiliar road.
“…Ah.”
She couldn’t remember the events that had just transpired. She had no recollection of how she got here instead of the hospital, or how she had walked all the way to this spot.
But such things didn’t matter; they weren’t worth her attention. Because currently, her mind was filled with a single concern.
“Doesn’t that mean we have no relationship?”
Erekaya knew well. Objectively, Jin and Erekaya Del Pendragon had no relationship whatsoever. They were merely strangers, just passing acquaintances.
Of course, if one were to delve deeper, Jin and Erekaya could never be said to be completely unrelated.
Though they were related so distantly that it seemed almost pointless to count, he was undeniably someone who carried the Pendragon bloodline and possessed a powerful synesthetic connection with Erekaya.
Moreover, Erekaya had… responsibilities.
Responsibilities for ruining his life. Responsibilities for wrecking his family. Responsibilities for shattering the happiness he was meant to enjoy… all those responsibilities.
Of course, all of this was indirectly related to Erekaya. She had been unaware of such matters in the past and had never been remotely interested in her family’s tumultuous history.
Yet Erekaya was the rightful heir of the Pendragon house and was destined to lead the family as its head.
That’s precisely why Erekaya was someone with a closer relationship to Jin than anyone else in the world and held an obligation to be responsible to him in one way or another.
…However, that was all something that wouldn’t be revealed on the surface and, at the same time, something that must never come to light.
When viewed without the “underlying reasons,” Jin and Erekaya truly had no relationship at all.
Erekaya wasn’t friends with Jin. In fact, before even considering the concept of friendship, they hadn’t properly spoken to each other.
Erekaya had only spoken to Jin once, when she had guided him to the dorm shortly after he enrolled, explaining various precautions he needed to take at Nineveh.
Erekaya wasn’t close to Jin. Although they were both part of Class A and shared many classes together, outside of that context, their relationship was painfully awkward.
Altina’s assertion that there was no relationship between Erekaya and Jin was, indeed, the truth.
Erekaya knew that well. She understood that Altina meant no harm; she was merely stating what she observed through her eyes.
…And that truth felt all too frightening to Erekaya.
No matter how much she recognized him as family and felt guilt towards him—
It meant that no one in the world acknowledged her feelings, her heart.
…Not even Jin himself, the very person at the center of it all.
“Jin.”
She couldn’t accept it.
She couldn’t accept it.
The fact that he was merely a stranger with no relationship to her, nothing more than an acquaintance—she could never come to terms with it.
That’s why she came. Without any calculation or scheme, she simply followed her impulse to come here.
To his room, which until now had only been permitted for Altina von Rudel Seryas and had never been allowed for anyone else.
“Hello.”
Her mind was a jumbled mess, and there was an unsettling knot in her chest. Her breaths were unusually ragged, yet she concealed such feelings behind a facade of calmness.
No, she couldn’t allow herself to act otherwise.
In front of no one but him, Erekaya Del Pendragon had to present herself as the rightful heir of the Pendragon house, embodying all the attributes that such a position entailed.
“…Uh, hi.”
Jin greeted her with a surprised expression, clearly caught off guard by her unexpected visit.
It was not hard to understand his feelings. After all, she had lost control over herself and had arrived here without warning, so it must have been utterly baffling for him to receive her without any preparation.
“Um, so what brings you here? Is there something you want to say to me?”
“…Something I want to say.”
If it was indeed a matter of things she wished to express or convey to him, there were countless feelings piled high like a mountain.
Yet, she could not voice any of it here. She couldn’t reveal the entire truth to someone completely in the dark like Jin.
The place they stood in was not suited for such discussions, and besides, the current Erekaya lacked the courage to confess anything.
Ultimately, all that escaped her lips was an ugly lie.
“I came to check on you because I was worried.”
“Worried? What about?”
“You know, there have been all sorts of strange rumors about you lately. And you seem to be staying holed up indoors, burdened by them.”
“Even if I look like this, I’m the Student Council President of Nineveh. It’s my duty to take responsibility for all the students. So, it’s impossible for me not to notice if a classmate is surrounded by strange rumors and appears to be feeling the weight of them.”
That was a lie. The ‘strange rumors’ surrounding Jin were, in fact, spread by the Chairperson.
Purposefully disseminated falsehoods meant to uncover Jin’s hidden past and drive away those pesky flies like Hugo that had been bothering him.
Erekaya was aware of this fact, but she was neither motivated nor inclined to step forward to correct the falsehoods.
A hidden bloodline of a noble house? That was true enough. After all, he was indeed a distant relative of the Pendragon house.
An illegitimate child of a foreign royal family? That too was not entirely incorrect, given that the Pendragon bloodline mixed with those of royalty flowed through him.
The rumors surrounding Jin were baseless fabrications, yet at the same time, they also contained elements of truth. But there was no reason for Erekaya to step in to tidy up those rumors.
“Oh, was that it?”
Perhaps accepting such a petty and cowardly excuse, Jin nodded his head.
“You don’t need to worry so much. While I can’t say I’m not bothered by the rumors, I’m quite used to those sorts of looks.”
As she observed Jin shrugging off the concern, Erekaya felt her heart drop.
…Used to it? Is he saying he’s accustomed to being judged and scrutinized by others?
Erekaya understood to some extent how bothersome it can be when people talk about you behind your back.
The glances filled with envy, the gazes of admiration, and the expectations—if even such things could make someone anxious, what kind of life must he have led to become accustomed to receiving scrutiny from others?
What kind of harsh environment had he been thrown into, and how had he managed to survive until now?
“Well, thanks for caring. Since you’ve come all this way, it feels wrong to just send you back. How about a quick cup of tea?”
With that, Jin grinned and waved her inside the room.
His room. Until now, it was a place no one except Altina von Rudel Seryas had ever entered.
“…Okay.”
Struggling to hide her fluttering heart, Erekaya carefully stepped inside Jin’s domain.
“There’s nothing remarkable to see, but feel free to look around a bit. I’ll go prepare some tea.”
With that, Jin slipped out of the room before Erekaya could even respond.
In the end, Erekaya found herself alone in the room.
“…..”
This was a completely unfamiliar space that she had never set foot in before, and it was a room belonging to another man. The combination of these two facts dulled her senses.
However, that moment passed quickly, and Erekaya slapped her own cheek, trying to regain her composure.
“No, no. Get a grip. Erekaya, you didn’t come here for this.”
Indeed, it could be seen as a golden opportunity.
After all, one of the reasons Erekaya had come to Jin’s room was to check on the whereabouts of the family photo that was in his possession.
Erekaya cautiously lifted her gaze and surveyed Jin’s room.
The room, and the scenery within it, felt incredibly desolate.
Aside from the supplies distributed uniformly to students by Nineveh, there were only a few books and everyday clothes representing his personal belongings.
It didn’t feel like a living space; it resembled an eerily well-arranged stage set.
“…..”
Seeing the state of the room, Erekaya couldn’t help but clench her teeth.
Why on earth was he residing in such a barren space? How could he be living in a setting devoid of any human warmth?
As far as Erekaya knew, Nineveh provided students with a monthly allowance for maintaining their dignity.
If he used that money, even if he didn’t indulge in extravagance, he could easily decorate this room to make it feel more like a home.
Yet, why wasn’t he investing any of that money for a decent life or his own comfort?
…Could it be that he was unaccustomed to such forms of “luxury”?
Had he been cast out by others and learned to evade them from a young age, becoming so accustomed to his situation that he forgot what it meant to live a human life?
And was all of this the result of her own karmic retribution?
She no longer wanted to gaze upon the stark reality of this room. She wanted to shut her eyes tightly and forget. Everything composing this space felt like her original sin, making her feel uneasy.
But then, it happened.
Erekaya’s eyes fell upon a photo gently placed on the desk.
“…A photo.”
In that instant, Erekaya’s heart began to race.
Could it be that this was the photo the Chairperson had mentioned? The family photo featuring Jin and his parents?
…But hold on, hadn’t the Chairperson said that nothing was found when they visited this room last time?
How was it that she was able to discover this photo so easily?
Could it be… that this was fate? That some force of destiny was pushing Erekaya to unveil the truth?
As if compelled by something, Erekaya walked over to the desk where the photo lay.
Her heart thumped so loudly that it drowned out all other sounds.
Ah, she was scared. Scared of confirming the truth and confronting the karmic retribution she had incurred with her own eyes.
Suppressing all those feelings, Erekaya resolutely flipped the photo over—
“…Ah.”
It was a family photo.
A cheerful scene featuring a couple who seemed to be husband and wife and a small child.
As the Chairperson had said, the hair color of the individuals in the photo was black.
This was the black hair that had belonged to the one who was expelled from the Pendragon house 50 years ago.
So, could it be that the child standing between the man and woman was none other than Jin himself?
However, regrettably, Erekaya couldn’t be certain that the child was indeed a young Jin.
No, from the very beginning, she couldn’t even see the child’s face.
This was because the child’s face in the photo had been completely blacked out with a pen, rendering it unrecognizable.
…As if thinking of themselves as an “impurity” for being in this photo.
