The definition of a monster isn’t that difficult.
If a creature has magical energy in its body and has a tendency to attack humans, then it’s called a monster.
Since it’s a broad term that encompasses creatures with magical energy, the types are countless. I might even fall under that category.
However, I was told by another monster that I wasn’t one of them. It made my head spin just a bit.
As if I wasn’t dizzy enough from losing so much blood, now I was even more confused.
“Am I not a monster?”
“I’m not sure either. I’ve never seen anything like you. Since you have magical energy in your body, you’re classified as a monster, but it seems there’s something else mixed in.”
She said she had never seen anything like me. A similar sentiment was echoed by a monster scholar not long ago.
To sort out the complicated thoughts, I asked her for her reason for thinking I wasn’t a monster.
“Why would I tell you…?”
“But we are kin, right?”
“Well, kind of… kin…”
Since she still hadn’t completely lowered her guard, I had to explain first that I wasn’t a being related to the Empire before hearing her answer.
After several attempts to show I had no intention to attack, she finally opened her heart.
This was also a challenging process. She cautiously began to speak.
“There are several reasons, but usually, monsters can’t speak. And they don’t look like humans. Just the fact that a creature that attacks humans resembles humans is impossible.”
“Isn’t that the same for you?”
“My case is a bit different. I’m more like a parasite in a host’s body. I kill the human and take over their body. In the process, I receive that human’s memories and am reborn in her perfect form.”
Is that why she can speak human language?
Since she completely inherits the memories, she becomes indistinguishable from the previous human.
She continued speaking, her words akin to my situation but with a slightly different method.
“Unless it’s an unusual case like mine, it’s impossible for a monster to speak human language. If you really are a monster, you might be a type similar to me.”
It could mean that I, who was originally a monster, was made by taking over human Iria’s body.
That was a useful clue. A deduction I couldn’t have thought of alone.
“I’m not sure if a monster entered a human body or if a human entered a monster’s body… but I can say for sure that you, as you are now, are neither human nor monster. You’re mixed in a way that even I can’t precisely distinguish.”
“….”
“You and I are not kin. I don’t know how you see me, but I don’t see you as kin. I think there are probably no other beings like you.”
No one else exists like me.
Monsters don’t consider me kin, and my own belief that I saw them as kin was just my delusion.
If I summarize her words, it would be like this.
Her eyes didn’t lie this time.
With my current condition, using abilities was impossible, so exact discernment was difficult, but she had no reason to lie from her standpoint either.
It’s highly likely the truth. I had directly asked her what it was like to be viewed from a monster’s perspective.
But it felt odd. If what she said was true, then what were the things I saw during the external practicum?
Other than shadow monsters, they didn’t attack me.
I couldn’t attack them either, as my instinctive rejection surged up.
So does that mean I’m not a monster? Many questions arose.
I took my time and asked one by one.
The nameless monster answered all my questions.
“Monsters have better nerves to sense magical energy than humans, right? The reason they didn’t attack you is probably because of that. Even if they don’t have intelligence, they’re not silly enough to charge at a being much stronger than them. With that much magical energy in your body, how could they attack?”
And.
“As for why you hesitate to kill monsters… It’s not exact, but your mental state might be closer to a monster than a human. While human emotions seem to still linger, you’ll probably become more and more tainted.”
It was a sharp observation.
It wasn’t that I was like this from the beginning but more like a gradual changing over time.
I asked her.
“How do you know all this so well?”
“Well, I was similar. Lucky for me, I took over a human body, so I thought I could blend in among them. I thought I could deceive perfectly, as ‘Amy’ instead of a nameless monster.”
Looking at the current state of her, I can see how that turned out.
It didn’t go well. Her end must surely be tragic, leading her to this state.
I understand how that feels. Even though I’m wearing a human mask, there’s a fundamental difference between humans and monsters.
Monsters cannot fully mix with humans. That’s a feeling I’ve been realizing lately.
“The humans that captured me asked why I killed humans, how I was able to talk to humans while causing casualties. Do you know what I answered?”
I shook my head while listening closely.
“I said there was no reason. Why did I kill? There’s no such thing. I just wanted to kill. Attacking humans is a monster’s instinct. We were born this way. We can’t live without attacking someone.”
“….”
“This time, I’ll ask you. How many have you killed? If you’re half monster, you probably can’t resist killing.”
I’ve killed a lot.
Now it’s hard to count.
I’d probably killed more humans than she did. The difference is that I had enough power not to get caught by the Empire after killing humans.
Amy was stronger than the shadow monster I had seen during the external practicum, but weaker than Albert.
I had heard there was a seed of the demon king captured by humans, so I thought it would be a relatively weak being, but it seems that wasn’t the case.
She wasn’t weak; Albert was just strong.
I casually responded that I didn’t quite remember. It’s hard to give an accurate count for how many I had killed when asked.
After hearing my answer, Amy was looking at me with a changed expression. I didn’t know how to express that look, but it felt a bit strange since she looked at me as if she felt sorry for me.
“You’re unhappy too, aren’t you?”
“I guess you could look at it that way.”
“Do you have any more questions?”
“I do.”
“Since you’re pitiful, I’ll answer within what I know.”
“….”
Her treatment was a little unpleasant.
Nevertheless, it was good that it brought out her sense of kinship. Returning empty-handed after coming this far was something I wanted to avoid.
I decided to tune into her feelings.
“You mentioned you get separate meals while locked up. So, what do you eat?”
Human blood? Or do they throw criminals’ flesh to her?
Out of curiosity, I asked.
And the answer that followed was shocking.
“That.”
Amy pointed with her finger to something next to her. Something squirmed on a dish that looked like a dog’s food bowl.
It was a living creature that hadn’t died yet. But it definitely wasn’t human.
“That…isn’t that a monster?”
“Exactly. They occasionally give me one of the test subjects from the upper floor.”
“You eat monsters? Is that even possible?”
“Depends on the species. There are so many types of monsters. I’m one of those who can engage in kin slaughter.”
I grimaced.
The idea of monsters eating other monsters was incomprehensible to me.
Come to think of it, didn’t shadow monsters also eat other monsters?
Since she mentioned ‘kin slaughtering’ specifically, it seems that there are types that can and cannot.
Could I do it? Reflecting on my life until now, the chances seemed low.
Still, just to be sure, I continued.
“How can you tell if you can engage in kin slaughter? I don’t want to try eating one directly.”
“You can tell by their appearance or teeth shape. Would you like to open your mouth and see?”
“….”
I wasn’t keen on showing my teeth. They were shaped a bit differently from a human’s.
But she is a monster. There’s nothing to hide now.
I approached her and opened my mouth wide.
“In your case… you seem to be somewhat close to a vampire type. Can’t eat.”
That figures.
I wasn’t holding my breath for an affirmative answer. Even if it was possible, I didn’t want to eat a monster.
Above all, just the thought of eating something, imagining it in my head, made me feel sick. Amy seems to have a good stomach.
Maybe her physique is different from mine.
In any case, I thought it was time to leave. It had been quite some time since I subdued Albert.
It wouldn’t be long before the Empire’s support troops would arrive.
Thus, to fulfill my final purpose of coming here, I asked her.
“Can I call you Amy?”
“If you want to call me that, go ahead.”
“Okay, Amy. If I were to ask you to give me a fragment of the demon king, would you?”
“Um.”
It might have been a slightly rude question. If a piece was removed from her body, which had become special as a seed of the demon king, she might revert to a regular monster.
She might even lose her ability to communicate. So I thought it was a difficult request even from my perspective.
It’s like someone presents themselves and asks for a part of the body at first meeting.
To be honest, I was thinking of taking it regardless of her response.
The fragment of the demon king was something I needed. With that, I wouldn’t have to eat for a pretty long time.
From the very beginning, I had come here intending to acquire that, so it wouldn’t be too much to forcefully take it.
I wondered if brandishing a knife would make her hand it over.
Just as my thoughts were veering toward a more extreme direction.
“It doesn’t really matter.”
“….”
“But instead, you’ll have to do me a favor. It won’t be a difficult request.”
“Tell me.”
A moment of silence passed.
And then.
“I want you to kill me.”
I found myself unable to move in that spot for some time.
