Chapter 184
Returning to the Academia, all external schedules ended.
But Erica could no longer walk down the hall of Academia with her usual confidence.
“Erica! What on earth is going on?! Why did you suddenly leave the Student Council?”
Erica quickened her pace, nearly fleeing. Hot on her heels was Saint Diphelia, now confirmed as the next Student Council President, calling after her with a face that looked like it might cry if provoked.
“Erica, please stop for a moment! Let’s talk. Did I do something wrong? If I did, I’ll apologize…! Why are you avoiding me—”
“—Don’t come any closer!”
Erica shouted almost like a scream. The small girl turned her head away, her blue eyes wide with fear.
Diphelia saw Erica’s unstable state through her familiar’s eyes.
“Erica…what’s wrong? What happened? You can tell me. If it’s hard for you alone, I’ll help you… okay?”
An ice-cold and fragile anxiety, like the dead of winter.
Seeing the coldness in Erica’s eyes, Diphelia felt shivers run down her spine. Nevertheless, she mustered her courage, slowly reached out, and took Erica’s slender hand.
“I don’t want to—!!”
Like a child seeing a monster.
Erica, terrified beyond measure, swatted Diphelia’s hand away and wrapped herself up. She tried to retreat, shaking in fear.
“Erica…why…”
Diphelia’s eyelids fluttered in disbelief, shocked at the reality before her.
Though it hadn’t even been a year, the bond she had built with Erica was precious, and seeing her like this was something Diphelia couldn’t adapt to.
Just as the two were frozen in their own worlds, Vargan appeared from one side of the hallway.
“……!”
Upon spotting Vargan, Erica’s expression completely changed.
Like a chick finding its mother, she suddenly activated Warp Magic and dashed to his side. Grabbing one of Vargan’s sleeves, she found a measure of comfort and quickly spoke.
“Schugenharz…! I… I left the Student Council! I wanted to join your Research Society…!”
“Erica….”
“I can use Warp Magic, you know. I’ll definitely be of help…! Even someone like me surely……! I want to help you. Can you allow me?”
“It will be…! Even someone like me…! I want to help you. Can you not permit me? Huh?”
Diphelia was struck by a massive shock, as if she had been hit on the back of her head again.
Erica clung to her like a puppy afraid of being abandoned by its owner. The anger towards that man, who was presumed to have made her this way, twisted her expression.
“What the hell is going on? Vargan!”
Diphelia, who knew that Erica had gone out with Vargan, shot back, finally expressing her anger towards someone for the first time.
Erica, who had just made a friend in Academia.
She seemed cold on the outside but was kinder and gentler than anyone on the inside. Yet to her…
“What did you do to Erica? What did you do that has her acting like this?!”
“……”
“Speak up! What on earth did you do to Erica—”
“—Don’t say anything about Schugenharz! It’s all my fault!”
Erica stepped in to block Diphelia, who was approaching Vargan in anger. Her eyes, which had previously held fear, now coexisted with hostility.
You couldn’t possibly call it a look of intimacy.
Even a stranger wouldn’t look at someone like that.
Erica spoke disdainfully, primarily directed towards herself.
“It’s all my fault… If you’re going to blame someone, blame me. If you’re going to be angry, be angry at me.”
Her intense tone gradually softened, and soon Erica was pleading.
Instead of cursing Vargan, she wanted to be stabbed in the gut if it meant not speaking ill of him any longer.
“Erica… why are you really like this…”
Diphelia’s voice trembled. But Erica showed no interest in her tears. Her gaze was solely for Vargan—nothing else.
Following Erica’s gaze, Diphelia turned to look at Vargan. Holding back tears that felt like they were about to spill out like vomit, she raised her head.
“……”
Then she faced the faint quiver in Vargan’s pupils.
He looked painful, as if he too was grieving.
Vargan, locking eyes with Diphelia.
“I’ll explain later.”
With just that one line, he vanished with Erica.
Left alone in the hallway, Diphelia could no longer hold back her sobs, burying her face in her hands. Each shudder of her shoulders let tears flow down her cheeks.
*
Erica was completely broken.
The betrayal regarding Laila and the painful truth kept secret for the sake of her family’s honor by her father.
And the unspeakable feelings about “me.”
She had become avoidant of others and had trouble trusting anyone, including Diphelia, who she had spent years together with, even calling her a friend, and Bantlo.
Fear of being betrayed at any moment. Questions and distrust about the intentions behind maintaining any relationship with her. Extreme anxiety about building connections with others had formed.
The sense of family honor had also vanished. Instead, there was only disgust towards the Head of Household Father due to disappointment.
Severe self-hatred and utterly extreme trust issues.
The only person she could believe in was me, and the reason she was still alive was also because of me. The guilt-ridden one was me too.
I was the only one capable of this, and the reason she couldn’t die was also me. I was the one burdened with guilt.
This complex situation led to contradictions in my actions.
“…….”
In the laboratory of Arbol Frutal. Erica, sitting next to me, tugged at my sleeve nervously. She probably wasn’t even aware of the fact that she was tugging.
…She’s distorted.
She despises herself to the point of wanting to die, but she can’t because of me.
She holds extreme affection for me, yet carries an equally heavy sense of guilt that prevents her from expressing it.
She knows I won’t leave, yet here she is, tugging at the end of my clothes, pleading not to be discarded. She wants to stay together.
The thought of me leaving makes her unbearable—it means she’d have to live alone in this terrifying world where she can’t even die.
“…And that’s how Erica ended up at Arbol Frutal. However, she won’t be assigned a specific role, so keep that in mind.”
I said to the executives gathered at Arbol Frutal. They responded, gazing at Erica with various expressions in their eyes.
As their gazes turned toward her, Erica pressed closer to me. The grip on my sleeve tightened. She was probably holding back her urge to cling to me to avoid bothering my nerves.
“……Erica.”
Bantlo, her childhood friend, looked darkened. I suspect some of his anger towards me was mixed in, but he didn’t pursue it.
I couldn’t reveal the full truth about Erica’s condition to the outside world.
It was a sensitive issue related to Vargan’s lifespan in the original story.
So, I stated that Erica experienced terrible hallucinations in the dungeon, resulting in extreme anxiety.
I had previously suggested to Erica to keep that story straight, and before I could finish, she agreed and told me not to worry.
—I absolutely won’t be a hindrance…!
Erica, with her distorted expression, made me feel like I was being stabbed in the heart every time I saw her desperate appearance.
The Academia was trying to help her recover, but naturally, it didn’t work.
Though she claimed to have seen hallucinations in the dungeon, she wasn’t cursed, nor was it related to mana.
It was a psychological issue.
The Academia had recommended a brief leave due to concerns about Erica’s future activities, but she vehemently opposed and exhibited anxiety, causing that plan to fall through.
The main reason she was trying to socialize and be out and about was that if she didn’t, she’d have to be apart from me.
Ultimately, I decided to take responsibility for her, effectively becoming a guardian, and Erica could attend the Academia.
“Also, know that Erica has been moved to Class 1.”
Since Erica, the leader of her original class, was in no condition to fulfill her duties, she moved to Class 1 where I was. Though it’s temporary, she’d likely be in Class 1 until the end of her first year.
“…….”
Frieda, trying not to show it, seemed displeased with the current situation.
She glanced at Erica with discontent and turned her head away.
I turned the topic.
……
For a while, I mixed in some lies to explain how Erica came to Arbol Frutal and then changed the subject. While Erica’s situation was important, sulking around was not an option.
I used my mana to extinguish the lights in the laboratory and projected images into the air.
The upcoming achievements and details Arbol Frutal needed to tackle were displayed.
After loosening my neck to shake off the gloomy tone, I spoke up.
“The time for assignments is upon us again. I know everyone is busy because of this, but neglecting the Research Society’s activities would be problematic. Each group leader should thoroughly evaluate and train their members. The policy is flexible, but if results do not follow, I will intervene.”
Until now, Arbol Frutal had provided members with education, competition, and near-real experiences, and as a result, we witnessed significant development.
At this point, many members’ skills had notably improved compared to the beginning, showing remarkable growth in the records.
However, things can never go smoothly all the time. It’s vital for the leaders to correct issues and whip away laziness.
“Once the assignment period ends, the Final Exam will be right around the corner. We must enhance our achievements in preparation for that.”
The Final Exam would be held in a tournament format. While details may vary, the overall structure is unlikely to change.
After the Final Exam, the first-year grades would be aggregated, granting access to the branches of Yggdrasil only available here. These branches are essential materials for the weapons we want to create, so they must be obtained.
Moreover, the Final Exam coincides with the time Finn declared he would return.
Given that he’s still not here, he might have met with misfortune or could miss the timing… but it feels too early to judge hastily.
I added further explanations and received reports.
After concluding the meeting with the Root members, I turned on the lights in the laboratory.
*
Once the meeting ended, Vargan stood up immediately. Erica, like a shadow, sprang up and followed him, making them the first to leave.
“Um… Young Master.”
As Vargan opened the laboratory door, Alicia called out to him.
All eyes around focused on them.
“What is it?”
Vargan paused for a moment, while Erica peered at Alicia from behind, half-hidden.
Alicia tried to speak as casually as possible. Hearing about Erica’s situation and having tears well up in her eyes had reddened them. Her lips moved, struggling with an awkward expression.
“…Are you okay?”
Before learning about Erica, Alicia had been excited at the thought of seeing Vargan after a long time.
Normally, she would have asked if he was okay, but would instead have said she would visit the dormitory that evening to show him her and Naias’s improvements.
However, Alicia first checked Vargan’s condition. Knowing how deeply he cared for Erica, she wanted to ensure he was alright.
Then Vargan replied.
“Your question is mistaken, Alicia.”
He had a different view from Alicia.
“The one suffering the most right now is not me, but her.”
