Chapter 83
“I come from the world outside.”
Vargan’s words echoed through the silence like a reverberating drum. Liam let out a hollow laugh, repeating that it was just as he thought.
His face twisted in a way that couldn’t handle the fluctuating emotions. It was true; Vargan was an amalgamation, just like him.
Memories flashed through his mind one by one.
Entrance Ceremony, Alicia, Research Society… Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a sword stained black.
“Naias… too.”
That thought crossed his mind.
Vargan intended to completely twist the existing storyline and move in a direction of his own liking, down a path that never existed before.
If that’s the case… could this incident also be a result of his influence?
It wasn’t like this in the original plot. The Archbishop and the Bishops never invaded the nest.
Regardless of how it occurred, Liam began to think hopefully that the future had changed due to Vargan’s influence rather than his own.
After all, it made sense that Vargan’s impact would be greater than his own quietly cautious movements, worried about the butterfly effect.
…Wait, what just crossed my mind?
Hopeful?
Why would… what is there to be hopeful about…!
Liam clenched his teeth tightly as if trying to crush them.
Even if the Archbishop had barged in due to Vargan, it was Liam himself who had led them into the main altar.
Had he not pushed forward with the plan to destroy the core, Ophelia, Haliana, and Lucaiel wouldn’t have been brutally killed.
Nikela wouldn’t have lost the ability to use magic anymore.
Liam was consumed by self-reproach.
“Ah… what a pathetic guy…!”
He wanted to hide the truth and lessen the blame.
Ironically, as this thought process flowed, nausea rose up alongside his self-hatred.
The current state he was in was far too…
Excessively.
“Disgusting, Liam.”
Vargan said to the weeping Liam, who had covered his mouth with his hands.
He instinctively tried to shift the blame as a mechanism of self-defense.
The most disgusting part was that he felt a little comforted by thinking that way.
—Hey, clean your ears and listen well. This final exam has been an ongoing tradition long before we existed.
—I still oppose it. And Haliana won’t participate in that plan either.
Lucaiel’s words hit him like a boomerang, piercing through his heart.
If only he had listened to his argument and accepted it. If only he hadn’t been so stubborn.
Or instead, if he had thrown away that weak thought that they might be harmed and challenged it alone.
Throwing away the weak thought that I might not make it and challenging myself alone.
If I had done that, this situation wouldn’t have happened.
This isn’t a burden to be shared with others. It’s solely my own. It’s all my fault.
Vargan is right.
I am disgusting.
Severely corrupted and filled with a stench.
“What should I have done… Where did it all go wrong?”
Liam’s throat trembled violently, and the voice breaking through was as mournful as the night sky.
Tears that he still couldn’t finish flowed in a line from his eyes.
With legs barely pushing off the ground, he grips Vargan’s shoulders. Using his body for momentum, he shakes him off.
“Why couldn’t I change the future like you… Why has the situation gotten worse?”
He speaks.
Why has someone as useless as me come to this place?
It would have been better if I hadn’t come at all.
If that had been the case, my comrades wouldn’t have died.
“What on earth… how am I supposed to live on from here?”
Liam’s self-esteem plummeted to the floor. It was that level of mistake and wound.
Ah…
Suddenly, his mind played a fuzzy screen as if watching an old movie.
Memories of playing with wooden swords with young Emily, or pulling up the beautiful puppy grass that grew around to tickle the puppies that settled in the village.
As the day was ending, the warm aroma of food that tickled his nose and the welcoming faces of his family when he returned home.
Those sounds and smells, buried in the soil called time, gently rose to cloud Liam’s vision.
Liam wanted to be buried in those memories.
He wanted to rub his face like a child and fall asleep in their arms.
‘I am… Liam. I am… Liam? What was my original name again?’
“Looks like you haven’t been hit enough yet.”
Thud!
The sudden shock brought Liam back to reality.
His focus returned, capturing the current situation.
Liam himself was doubled over, clutching his abdomen in pain.
The long shadow of Vargan stepped back into the road. A disgruntled noble, displeased with Liam’s lowered head, kicked him.
Pushed back, Liam fell to the ground.
As his face was struck, he tasted blood in his mouth, possibly from biting down wrong.
“Letting you act foolishly is only good for a few times. You always look for problems outside and have the bad habit of only wanting to write down others’ answers. You haven’t built even a speck of what belongs to you, have you?”
Liam’s achievements were not entirely his own.
They were results dependent solely on the power of his status and skills.
Just like Alicia, who worked tirelessly while drastically reducing her nights to learn the unfamiliar sensations of mana and swordsmanship with her innate talent.
Just like Finn, a genius, who strives endlessly to ensure that the next swing of his sword has better posture, breath, and power than the last.
Even Vargan, who similarly received benefits from possession, consistently sought ways to improve.
One cannot simply pretend to grow a game character with mere status screens and the numbers written there.
You must directly explore the study of magic and engrave the fundamentals and flow of swordsmanship into your body.
Status and skills are not results in themselves; they must be used as tools to pump up your levels more effectively.
It should be used as a “tool” to pump up the level more effectively, rather than an end in itself.
However, Liam, this pesky bug, only manages to realize this after Emily’s death in the original story.
More specifically, it was two months of wasted time in a daze after her death, and only when that weak soul finally returned.
It was only after truly feeling that his power was lacking that he belatedly started what could be called proper training.
“You seem to think of this world as a novel and are obsessing over distinguishing it from the outside reality.”
To Vargan, who knows the truth, this was a thoroughly ridiculous statement.
Liam doesn’t know anything.
He’s blissfully unaware of the predicament he’s in.
“This place where you and I are alive and breathing is our world.”
Despite being in the same situation of reincarnation, the difference between the two stemmed from their differing values and perspectives on the present world.
Vargan had no attachment to the world he called the real world. He boldly let go of that and focused solely on the current situation.
That’s why Vargan thoroughly investigated his original status, abilities, and wealth, using the story to try and bend the framework.
For him, every moment here was reality and truth.
On the other hand, Liam couldn’t shake off his attachment to the outside world and disparaged this place by calling it virtual or fake.
He might not even realize it.
But from Vargan’s perspective, Liam was firmly drawing a line between the two worlds, unconsciously looking down on this world of fiction.
When certain conditions are met and points are scored, simply raising the numbers allows someone to easily surpass the training others undergo.
Isn’t that interesting?
Didn’t those diligently training seem foolish?
Finn could easily trample over the achievements that took thousands or tens of thousands of hits on a scarecrow with just a flick of his finger.
This isn’t really about good or evil; it’s essentially an emotion stemming from the unconscious superiority inherent in humans.
“Your eyes see the scenery in the novel, your ears hear the dialogue of the characters, yet your brain judges it all as mere text. You don’t even know your own place.”
“…No. That’s not true. I… I valued the bonds I formed with the friends I met here!”
Of course, on a personal emotional level like justice and righteousness, Liam possesses excellent empathy.
After all, that was the root of this incident. He reflected his emotions onto the characters and acted without weighing the pros and cons to help them.
But is that truly the feeling of the reincarnated Liam?
Or is it the inherent nature of the character known as ‘Liam’?
It doesn’t matter which it is, but this is a point that needs addressing for the current Liam.
Thus, Vargan coolly stated.
“That’s a result of the deception created by the ‘reincarnated you’ feeling pity for the characters and the ‘Liam’ character who held the bonds with people dear and had a strong sense of justice.”
“Are you… saying I looked down on others?”
“Yes. You are far more arrogantly oblivious than I am.”
From the get-go, the dimensions of their perspectives are different.
Vargan treated others as tools or characters for his own use, yet his gaze existed within the same world as them.
He existed in a world like theirs.
However, Liam displayed a commendable attitude of caring for everyone, treating the characters as individuals, yet his eyes were fixed on the book as he looked down at them.
Feelings like sadness or joy for other characters can easily arise not only in real human relationships but also through creations such as stories.
Tears flowed as he read a book.
Laughter erupted while watching a movie.
Liam immersed himself in the so-called game characters or the figures in a novel, progressing the story.
Vargan tore apart and shook Liam’s contradictions. Liam reflected on his past actions with hollow eyes.
In truth, he had no interest in how Liam genuinely treated them.
Why should it matter how this guy sees the world…? Though he wanted to brush it off, Liam was, after all, the damn protagonist.
Considering his future growth and potential, it was a problem that had to be addressed.
If left alone, he would only become more useless or rot away.
“Make your own judgments and take action. Even if it leads to wrong choices, accept it humbly.”
He didn’t offer kind words suggesting leaning on him as nourishment for progress.
He thought it was overly ambitious to expect someone who couldn’t even stand properly to move forward.
Deep down, he wanted to reduce Liam to a near-death state, removing Ophelia, Haliana, Lucaiel, and even one of the heroines, Nikela, from the game. But he held back.
It wouldn’t change anything if he became a fan of Liam.
It was a meaningless action based on pure emotion. It would just waste mana and stamina.
What’s passed is passed; let’s not dwell.
He wouldn’t be swayed by emotion. He had to think rationally.
Let’s calculate what benefit could be gained from this situation.
Thus, Vargan suppressed his anger and restrained his emotions. While he couldn’t consider it as beneficial, Liam’s skill, originally filled by Emily, awakened earlier than expected.
This fragile mind might take more time to awaken, but the groundwork had been laid, so all that was left was for him to jump.
The question was when he would take that first step, but it wasn’t something he could assist with.
As he told Liam, he had to get used to acting on his own.
The conversation Vargan had with Liam tonight was all a cornerstone for the future.
Vargan, he was that kind of person.
“That’s all I can say.”
The night deepened.
Vargan looked at Liam, who resembled a shell without a soul, and continued to speak.
He had been rationally judging and enduring but could no longer bear to see him awake, wanting to erase him from sight.
He had conveyed everything he needed to.
Now, he didn’t have to hold back anymore.
“If you understood, just get the hell out of here and go to your sickroom.”
Vargan issued a summoning order to Liam.
Seeing Liam’s empty eyes, he thought he wouldn’t be in his right mind for several days.
Liam weakly exited the sickroom.
His shoulders were slumped, and all he could manage was to move his legs to walk.
Vargan clicked his tongue, dissatisfied with Liam’s appearance.
“Really, he’s inherited this unpleasantness to the core.”
No one knew who he thought of when he looked at Liam.
