To be honest.
When it was revealed that Yor was an Awakened, Chaerin felt a bit disappointed.
It was because a secret known to only a few had been laid bare for the whole world.
Of course, it was a matter of life and death for him, but this meant that the secret shared by a select few was gone.
It might seem a bit selfish, but there’s nothing to be done about it. After all, reason and emotion are different matters.
So she vaguely hoped that she would learn another secret…
Just as she was thinking that, an opportunity to get another glimpse into one of his secrets came around.
However… contrary to Chaerin’s thoughts, she didn’t feel particularly good about it.
Instead, confusion weighed heavily on her heart.
This wasn’t the kind of heavy secret she wanted.
“Ugh… urgh…”
She narrowed her eyes and looked ahead.
In front of her, a 19-mode scene was unfolding. And it was a somewhat different meaning of 19-mode, mind you.
A human who was previously unfazed by a spear piercing through his body was now writhing in pain.
Even Chaerin, who had become somewhat immune to cruelty from leveling up, frowned at the sight.
As parts of his body began to convulse, Yor picked up a dagger and stabbed that area without hesitation. Blood splattered forth, and it danced on the ground for a moment before settling down.
Seeing that, Chaerin understood what he was doing. He was drawing out uncontrollable blood. Leaving it would obviously damage his bones and organs.
However, the process looked incredibly painful.
The only relief was that the pain seemed to come and go intermittently.
After extracting blood from his body for a while, he finally got a moment to catch his breath.
That was the only time when they could actually have a conversation.
“… It’s called Rage. Awakeneds experience it once a month.”
Huff, puff.
Yor leaned against the wall, breathing heavily. Even though it hadn’t been long, sweat was already pouring down his forehead.
“When that explodes, various side effects hit the body for a bit.”
“… Wait, once a month? How long has that been the case?”
“Well… probably since I was around ten.”
Chaerin looked around the bleak cave once more.
She was starting to understand how this cave had come to look this way.
It was all his doing. Not just today, but months ago and even years ago.
He had endured torment countless times here.
Realizing that made the surroundings feel even heavier.
Overwhelmed by the weight of time felt everywhere, she momentarily lost her breath.
Even though this was all just a scene from a video game, wasn’t it a bit much…?
Chaerin asked him with a worried tone.
“Is there anything I can help with?”
“No, I’m good… Just having you by my side is enough.”
That was the truth.
For Yor, just having someone nearby was comforting.
There was no need for her to feel responsible to help. Just sending concerned glances from nearby was sufficient.
In the first place, there was no real way for her to help him.
From that, Chaerin felt a twinge of helplessness.
Of course, no matter how she felt, the process of Rage continued regardless.
As parts of his body began to convulse again, he sliced his skin with a dagger without hesitation.
Every time he did, his expression would wrinkle further.
After draining the blood once more, he forced a laugh and said,
“Hehe, isn’t it kind of similar? You girls go through your periods once a month, right?”
“No, is joking really appropriate right now?”
Chaerin involuntarily frowned at him.
It wasn’t that his joke upset her, but it was uncomfortable that he was trying to lighten the mood in such a situation.
Why think of anything else in a situation like this when he looked like he was having such a hard time?
Regardless of that, Yor just kept chuckling.
It wasn’t because he found it funny, but more to break the stiff atmosphere.
Chaerin admired him quietly for a moment.
‘People really are strong…’
It wasn’t just about physical strength. He was incredibly resilient mentally as well.
After all, he had lived through something like this every month up until now.
If it had been her, she probably wouldn’t have lasted long before breaking down.
Chaerin looked at him with a glance full of sympathy for a moment.
Time passed like that.
Night was gradually fading away…
*
“How long has it been…?”
After several hours, when it was getting tough to bear, I reluctantly drank the remaining bottle of Holy Water.
It was a bit of a waste since it was the last bottle, but I couldn’t just keep hurting myself with a guest around.
Still, it was probably less than what she felt watching my self-harm show.
Her mental strength must have been considerably drained too.
Therefore, using the Holy Water was the right choice for both of us.
Still, perhaps because I had someone beside me, this month’s Rage was bearable. Normally, I would have been rolling on the ground in pain by this time.
As I took a sigh of relief, Chaerin murmured.
“Oh, so that’s why you keep…”
It seemed she finally understood my requests from before.
After pondering for a moment, she asked me,
“So, does that mean if you don’t have Holy Water, you have to go through this pain every month?”
“No, it’s not always like this. Rage has two types, and when it’s a different type, it’s a bit easier.”
I briefly explained that the other type affects the mind.
It felt strange revealing that I had a mental issue to someone. I mean, it’s just a mental issue that happens once a month, so it doesn’t disrupt daily life.
After explaining, she asked again.
“So, how do you usually endure the other type?”
“Usually, I wander around outside until morning… um, usually that’s how it goes.”
Sometimes, when lust strikes, I might endure by pleasuring myself in the cave, but I didn’t need to mention that. I have my dignity, after all.
Luckily, even though I fumbled through my words, she let it slide.
Still, anyway, with this, I had made it through this month. I had earned another month-long reprieve.
As my tension eased, fatigue crept in.
I rose and briefly scanned my body. A faint smile crossed my lips.
‘I’m covered in blood…’
Well, of course, since I had drained so much blood. I wanted to bathe and sleep quickly.
As usual, I hadn’t planned to clean the cave.
I was too tired to clean, and it takes a while to clean up the blood.
Of course, there would still be stains left this time too, but I had already reached the point where it didn’t even matter.
So I got up to head to the puddle of water in the center of the cave.
Chaerin was still wearing a face full of sorrow. Honestly, she looked like she might burst into tears with just a gentle poke.
Seeing that made me feel a little bad.
In the end, it was me who was scared to endure this alone and asked her to stay with me.
Of course, I had no regrets. With the location of the cave exposed, I needed at least one person to keep me company.
“…”
To be honest, I wanted to keep guard while I slept, but I decided against it. Perhaps because I used Holy Water, I still had some mental strength left.
With this much, I would be able to handle anyone who came in while I was asleep.
With that in mind, I pretended to be bright and slapped her on the back.
Smack!
“Ah!”
Startled by the sudden hit on her back, she looked at me in surprise.
“Come on, stop sulking and get up. Thanks for being here at night. You must be tired, so you can head back now.”
With that, I sent her back home. Her expression still remained gloomy.
*
When she stepped outside the cave, the sky was painted a purple hue.
In other words, it was late dawn.
The sun hadn’t risen yet, but it would be soon.
She gazed at the hazy sky, smiling bitterly.
‘I really slept through the whole night…’
She had ended up staying up all night unexpectedly.
And she probably wouldn’t be able to take a nap now. The images from this night were just too shocking for her to easily find peace in sleep.
Even the one who always seemed strong showed a vulnerable side.
And that side was much heavier than she had expected.
Chaerin was startled not only by the Rage but also by the cave’s dark and lonely atmosphere.
Once the remaining fire was extinguished, utter darkness enveloped everything.
Thinking of Yor enduring pain alone in that darkness raised unnecessary worry within her.
Well… it seemed he had been managing fine until now.
But having witnessed a scene like today, there was no helping but for her to be concerned.
“…”
So she opened her skill window for a moment. There was a skill that came to mind.
[In Demon’s Saga,] the skill system wasn’t that different from other games.
Leveling up grants you skill points, which can be used to learn skills.
However, one notable difference was that each skill was extremely expensive.
In the case of the sought-after spear technique, it costs a whopping 160 points to acquire it.
In other words, you’d need to be at least level 160 to learn it.
At this point, it felt like they were threatening you to just go train to learn.
Anyway, there was a bit of an explanation, but the conclusion was simple.
Chaerin had found a skill that she wanted to learn.
Her gaze flickered to a corner of the skill window where an unlearned skill was flashing.
‘Night Vision.’
The ability was simple: seeing clearly in the dark.
The reason she wanted to learn it was also simple. To navigate through the dangerous forest at night.
Until now, she had avoided it as a waste of skill points, but now she had a reason to learn it.
‘… I should visit at night more often.’
But she was still short on skill points.
Determined, she set her sights on leveling up more diligently in the future.
As time passed.
The short winter was fading away, and the seasons were preparing to change again.
